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But now let’s get to a question, asked by Bernard, on the
nature of ultimate Awareness and how you can know if you are there.
Hallo Michael,
Thanks so much for your feedback to
my questions.
I understand that I am awareness and not my mind or my
emotions or my body but I am not sure that there is nothing deeper than my
awareness. I say this because while I sometimes get lost in thought and
awareness is ‘in the background,’ there are times when awareness is gone
such as when I am in deep sleep and not dreaming. Then I am really dead not
only to the world but even awareness is no where around. How should I know that
when I really do die that awareness will also disappear in which case awareness
itself must be an illusion.
As I meditate on this the following comes to me. If
awareness is a window with the ‘soul’ looking through then if the window is
covered by a blind(sleep) or the glass shattered( death) then the soul as it
were moves on and everything it saw looking through the window is no longer
there and has no reality. While that is a nice idea how can I know that
this is true and not just a story I have conjured up .
Have a great weekend,
Bernard
Hi Bernard,
Thank you for questions. They show your desire to experience
what you know. Generally when we want to know something we stand apart from it
and observe it. For instance, if we want to know the nature of a planet like Mars,
we use a telescope and observe it and then record our findings. We are the seer
and Mars is the object that we see.
But what about when we want to know the seer of the things
that we observe? What instrument can we use to observe ourself? The seer is
Consciousness. We cannot stand apart from what we are and observe our
self-nature like is was an object. That’s because the thing that would attempt
to stand apart is just another object, and not the seer. An object is too
limited to observe the nature of Awareness.
To stand as the mind and attempt to see Consciousness is
like the planet mars attempting to see us. Now we know that this is ridiculous,
because Mars is just dead matter, and dead matter cannot see us. But our mind
is also dead matter. It is Awareness that sees the mind and makes it come
alive.
To illustrate this, I often use the analogy of a computer.
If we really valued our mind above all else, we would hope to become a
computer, wouldn’t we? We would pray, “God, in my next life can I please become
a computer!” But we all recognize that in a computer something is missing. A
computer is not aware of its mind, and it is the awareness that we value even
more than our mind. That’s because awareness is really our self-nature.
But what happens is that we look right past the stillness that
sees change, and we mix up our identity with the objects that seem to be in motion.
And thus we appear to take on the characteristics of the mind and body.
The problem with this is that we then seem to experience the
limitations of the mind and body like old age, disease, and death. The mind and
the body are too limited for us and so we appear to suffer. To relieve this
suffering, return to your natural state of Awareness.
But now we are back to the problem that I mentioned at the
beginning. How can we become something that we can’t see? The answer is that
awareness is self luminous; you know awareness because you are awareness. This
is like the sun knowing light because the sun is light. That means that you do
not need a candle to find the sun. In the same way you do not need a separate
mind to illumine Awareness. You know Awareness directly because you are Awareness.
If you want to know Awareness, it is best to stand as the Awareness that you really are. Then from your direct experience you will know what Awareness really is. You will will not only find that you are free from your mind, you will find that you are free of the universe itself. You will finally find the identity that is the perfect size for you.
But by the very act of reading this article, you appear to
be centered in the mind that you use to see these words and comprehend them.
That’s why I recommend taking some time each day to let go of these words and
to abide as the seer. It is not by the mind that you comprehend this article;
it is by awareness. So return to your true center.
At first, you my have the sense that you are the mind
visiting awareness. This is like visiting a different country such as India.
It is nice while you are there, but you will come back to what you take to be home.
In the same way you will have experiences of standing as awareness, but as long
as you take your home to be the mind, you will appear to come back to the mind.
That is until you finally recognize that your real home is a
mansion, and not the shack that you got used to living in. At this point there
will be no returns to limitation and you are free.
So what are the signs that you are centered in the mind, and how to break free? First, when you feel that in deep sleep Awareness is gone. In deep sleep the mind is
gone, but you are aware of that absence, aren’t you? Even when the mind is
absent, as Awareness you are still present.
Now if deep sleep is too subtle for you, notice when you
start to wonder, “What is the awareness that is aware of awareness which is
aware of this awareness, etc?” This is sometimes called an infinite regression.
But you are aware of this whole mental process, aren’t you? The whole time that
you are wondering about the ultimate awareness, you are the ultimate Awareness,
standing free of your thinking process.
Also if you start to posit many different things in the
story look again. For instance when you say,
“If awareness is a window with the
‘soul’ looking through, then if the window is covered by a blind (sleep), or
the glass shattered (death) then the soul as it were, moves on and everything
it saw looking through the window is no longer there and has no reality.”
Awareness is not a separate thing constrained to a window. It
is everything in the story and nothing, both at the same time. It is the soul,
the blind, and the glass shattered. Just remain as the awareness that sees this
story and let the story come and go as it wishes.
A better story is that you are the space that is in and
through everything without the least separation. Fire can’t burn the space, water
can’t wet it, the wind can’t blow it away, and there is nothing to shatter.
Just remain here and be at peace.
And continue to ask questions until you are free. Freedom is
really your nature ― not the limitations that you may seem to experience. So if
you feel trapped in your world, or in your mind, just start questioning and you
will find that your state of mind turns into your original state of Being. Here
you are free.
And
if you need help, ask here and we can explore and find answers together. If the
comment section of this blog doesn't work, please send your questions and
comments to michael@ananya.com. To find
out where this all leads go to, www.light-up-your-life.com.
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Best
Wishes,
Michael